Fall

Fall is always joyfully melancholic. It's a wonderful time of year, and September is the most beautiful month where I live, but the chill that creeps into the air reminds you that winter is on its way.

Fall makes me think about past relationships and my friends. It might be the zeitgeist, (I'm writing this in AD 2020), but I always seem to miss people more as the trees lose their leaves, like I'm remembering what I lost when I drifted away from them or when they drifted away from me.

Black tea on a cool fall day, apple cider in the evenings, these are some nice fall things that add to being in this season.

A girl I was seeing broke up with me at the start of this fall. She was cute and it was on good terms, so whatever. A different girl I was 'dating'don't get me started broke up with me last fall, though closer to winter that was. I'm at the point where I don't want to see people's relationship status on social media because I don't want to remember or imagine. Have I fallen in love with falling in love?

I thought spring was when all these feelings were supposed to appear. Sitting here moping won't effect any change! I will go and do something, like swinging kettlebells or praying the hours, and мое настроение улучшится.


It's 2pm on a Friday, and I'm looking out the kitchen window at the most brilliant tree. How do I even begin to describe its color? It is mostly red and orange secondarily, with a few yellow-green leaves closer inside. I have a cup of coffee and an old computer running Haiku in front of me.

Being inside and away from other people is really beginning to take its toll I think. I am beginning to dread winter, when it won't be acumendliċ to meet outside.